Grieving The Loss Of A Child… Whether They Died Or Just Gone to Live Their Own Life No matter how you slice it, a big change like this, even if it is the best of the child, is a huge trauma for the parent, especially the mother. Most mothers are programmed to care for their young ones, but while they are doing that, they forget to be themselves, forget to rebuild a life of their own, so when the child dies, or leaves, they are left with nothing. I have a student whose children live in other countries, you can’t just offer to drop by, bring some good home-made cooking, or babysit their child while they attend to other things