When you ask people what made them who they are today, invariably all of them answer a version of the same thing: The past.
How they express this varies: my parents, my schooling, what I have been doing, my genes, etc. etc. but all in all, they all mean the same: what makes me who I am today is the past.
If that were true, that would be bad news, really.
Imagine that it is true. Now see yourself trying to be successful online. Given your track record, and your genes, and your past behavior, how much chance do you have for success?
I’d love to say zero, but it would be unfair to many of you. So instead, I answer it in a way that applies to all of you:
The same as yesterday. Or a year ago…
Now, that is a total bummer, isn’t it?
And it is total hogwash. It is a lie. It is an illusion.
If that were true, no change would be possible. And people do change. Not many, not often, but they do.
This week has been a success for Life, and a disaster financially. Everyone was spending their money on turkey, I guess.
So I am going to announce some sales for this coming week. I’ll make them good… so you’ll buy.
Now, about the successes that lead me to a huge insight.
All that people do is guided by memes, and they think they decided to do it. And you think they decided to do it from the goodness of their heart, from the badness of their heart, whatever seem to be the case. But in fact they never decided anything… It is the memes that are doing the deciding.
This is a totally different way to look at people, at life, and at what’s happening.
If you want to enslave a man, the best and fastest way to go about it is to rob the man of his common sense, his guidance system.
Train him to not trust his feelings. In anything. Train him that he can’t trust his feelings. Train him that all decisions should be made by men smarter than him. Train him that he can’t be trusted to made decisions about the education, the health about his children.
Train him by printing on plastic bags that they should not be put in the cradle… because a child may suffocate playing with it… Do this so the man will stop thinking for himself and start relying entirely on thing being given to him chewed and digested.
This article shows the state of official science for emotional intelligence.
Psychologists are not interested in the groundbreaking work developed in the books Feelings and Words…
Although when you can already recognize your feelings, their inner dynamics, what they want you to do, what trap you my have stepped, unwittingly, the advice below is quite good.
Until then I don’t think it’s useful… Or may not be useful.
Even though emotional intelligence is really important to live a good life, to have good relationships, to get things done, to be well… for all of life.
OK, here is the article from Wikihow
Emotional intelligence (EQ) is the ability to tap into your emotions and use them to make your life better. Being in touch with your feelings allows you to manage stress levels and communicate effectively with other people, two skills that enhance your life both personally and professionally. Unlike IQ, which remains constant throughout your life,
The hardest thing for people is to find the middle ground, the sustainable, the mean. The smooth. The life they claim they want. Everyone, on and off the internet, is trying to monopolize your time.
It is a lot like walking on a rope… any movement, leaning to the left immediately needs to be balanced to the right.
In rope dancing the consequences are clear and immediate.
In plate spinning: the consequences are clear and immediate.
In life, even in business, the consequences are removed, timewise, and unless you are astute with a very wide cone of vision, you don’t know what you are causing with each and every movement you make…
As people round the steps in the 67 step coaching program, as they begin the second cycle, they start to see new things, or they keep on seeing the same things…
Some see the things from memory. Comparing. “Knowing”. And some from actually seeing.
Step two (in the 67 steps) introduces the idea of the Selfish Gene, evolutionary stable strategy.
This point is where people diverge: one in the direction of the Tree of Knowledge, the other in the direction of the Tree of Life.
It is really amazing to watch them go, unaware of the other path.
I will illustrate this with their own words… but before I do, I want to set down some principles:
