Imagine this scenario: You look up your bank balance, see the number. And suddenly dread grabs your chest and you are off to panic-land.
You see that unless you start generating an income before the end of the month, you’ll be on the dole… at the mercy of others, at the mercy of social services… You’ve run out of money, and you have run out of time.
What do you do now? Continue reading
Know thyself… said the Greeks, and I can’t agree more.
Unless you are clear about where you are, what are your limitations, what are your inner pulls (conation), your results in life will be puny, in every area of life.
Know Thyself If men would search diligently their own minds, and examine minutely their thoughts and actions, they would be more cautious in censuring the conduct of others, as they would find in themselves abundantly sufficient cause for reproof. “It is a good horse that never stumbles;” and lie is a good man indeed who cannot reproach himself with numerous slips and errors.” “Every bean has its black,” and every man his follies and vices.
The adage also teaches us to set a proper value upon ourselves, and to be careful not to do anything that may degrade us. It is not known to whom we are indebted for this golden rule; we only learn that it is of very long standing, and was held in such high estimation by the ancients, that it was placed over the doors of their temples, and it was also supposed by them, that ” E coelo descen- dit,” it came down from heaven. ” ‘Man know thyself!’ tins precept from on high Came down, imagined by the Deity; Oh! be the words indelibly imprest On the live tablet of each human breast.
But how do you Know Yourself? Know yourself as others know yourself? Know about yourself? Know what psychologist made up as a category for yourself? Do the test that was devised for testing privates sent to fight in the VietNam war?
People want to know themselves to make it easier to win… to make it easier to beat bad habits. To justify why they are the way they are.
My experience (as a coach, 30 years and thousands of people), has been that you do best when you know your machine. Your machine has a bent… an inclination, and if you know it you can be successful… with any machine.
Some 30 years ago I had a car I didn’t have to lock, because only I could drive it. It would stall for everyone else. I drove it another 100 thousand miles. I got it after the previous owner gave up on it. It had 160 thousand miles on it.
The knowledge: know yourself, here, with that car, applied to the car and myself, together. The car was seriously flawed… but no one could have guessed from the outside, when I drove it.
I have dyslexia, serious, but I read one or two books every week. I also write for a living.
I had two major episodes of brain damage: you wouldn’t know it. I know how to drive my machine.
My soul correction is arrogance and condescension. It’s taken me longer to drive my life with these horrible afflictions, but knowing it made it possible.
When you know all the quirks of your machine, when you know what is your unscratchable itch, when you know what the machine will do unless you compensate for it, you can take your machine anywhere, any heights, any distance, any achievement.
As you work to grow in different areas in you life, it is important to really know yourself. The concept of not knowing yourself may sound preposterous to some people, but hear me out. Because we live such hectic lives, it is important to take time to become reacquainted with ourselves. It is very easy to get so focused on living life that we lose ourselves in the hustle and the bustle. With every phase in life, we change and evolve, and if all goes as planned, we should not be the same person we were five years ago. This is not to say that everything about us has to change, but it is perfectly natural and healthy to mature and grow in different areas.
Knowing yourself can help you improve your work ethic because you can really understand your limitations and know when you are pushing yourself too hard. If you are a self starter like me, you would probably work for 24 hours a day if you could. In fact, you’ve probably had to make yourself step away from your work one more than one occasion. While this self starting attitude is a good thing, it can also be a problem. If you aren’t careful, your desire for success can drive others away from you and actually ruin relationships. You may be thinking, “I thought we were supposed to be able to accomplish everything.” That is true, but sometimes you can bite of much more than you can chew, and running yourself into the ground to accomplish goals in not healthy. The beauty of accomplishing goals and achieving personal growth is discovering the balance of work and play.
While it is important to know your limits, knowing yourself helps you to know what you can’t accomplish as well as what you can accomplish. Many times, people don’t push themselves to accomplish real goals simply because thy think don’t think they’ll be successful. Once you really know yourself, you will know what you can accomplish. However, if you never try, you’ll never know how much you can truly accomplish.
When you know yourself, it is easier to keep yourself motivated. It you met someone for the first time, and they asked you to encourage them without giving you any details about their life, you would have a hard time encouraging them. By being aware of the types of things that keep you motivated, you will be less likely to reach that rock bottom point where you feel like your world is crumbling around you. It is best to constantly encourage and motivate yourself as your grow and mature.
How do you react to disappointment? What do you do when you’re sad? How often do you need to take time to truly relax? In order to maintain balance in your life, you have to constantly ask yourself these types of questions. Not only do you need to know yourself in order to have a strong foundation for personal growth, but you also have to be willing to motivate yourself when things are less than ideal.
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Read the original article: Why Knowing Yourself Is The Foundation Of Personal Growth
If you love yourself, you love your life.
It sounds so good, but how could you? How could you love yourself, knowing all the horrible things you have done?!
Last night, after the Playground, after I turned the light off… memories of those horrible things started to revisit.
After about 10-15 minutes of that I was feeling really horrible, doubting that I can do any good in the world. And then it hit me: none of the horrible things I said I did ever happened.
What? was I lying to myself? Continue reading
When you change the way you see things, the things you see change!The measure of intelligence is the ability to change.
-Einstein
I have a disproportionately large number of people asking for their numbers, whose soul correction is “Sexual Energy”
I could ponder why the Kabbalist named the soul correction that… but instead of that I’ll say: How you do anything is how you do everything… meaning whatever your attitude to one thing in life, will be visible in every area of life, including sex.
The main attitude of this soul correction, “Sexual Energy” is: It is my due. One may say “I deserve it”. I heard the expression “Magiya li” in Israel a lot. [note]the belief that one is inherently deserving of privileges or special treatment.[/note]
We all think about certain things, we all view certain privileges as a right, as a due, as an “of course”, but the nature of reality dares to differ. Continue reading
Maybe love is wanting even more for you than you want for yourself… but I am not sure about that.
Because of great love one is courageous. And coaching you is a lot like training tigers to act like pussycats… And as dangerous.
A coach wants for you what you say you want for yourself… Continue reading
Are you always going for the home run? The big win?One of the most useful steps in the 67 steps is the step where Tai compares business/life to baseball.
The most important aspect of business is to not lose money. Money lost is the result of mistakes. Mistakes are the results of hasty actions, or actions that try to go from zero to sky high in one fell swoop.
Like a baseball player who tries to hit the ball so hard every time as to be able to have a home run…
Most people I talk to have no skills, no plans, no idea… but when I ask them what they are up to, they talk about the sky-high.
Most people want to raise their vibration to 500+ right away… Continue reading
Well, that didn’t turn out the way I imagined.
I planned to have a series of coaching sessions to test the “itch” method. I made room for 10 people… would have been happy with 8, got one person, someone who knows me well, and in addition I have done the process with her already…
I bet you would be disappointed, and your mind would go crazy on you, if this happened to you… am I right? Me? I am amused, I am curious, I am happy. Not pretend happy, just happy.
How is that possible?
Continue reading
The book ‘The Art of Hunting Humans‘ calls them the Superiors.
The 1000 are the producers of the world… and believe it or not, they got there and stay there by CONSISTENTLY PRACTICING certain ways of being and behaving that are very different from how others behave.
According to muscletesting, they turned on the required genes by practicing those behaviors CONSISTENTLY.
The masses, you, the eight billion, would want someone to turn on the genes for them… but NEVER would consider that genes are not some fork or spoon. Some object lying about. and when you want to eat you can pick them up and use them… the capacities are not even visible, not obviously available unless you initiate the behavior to use them. You need to initiate… from some vision, or demand of yourself… Do you have any demands of yourself?
And he is also aware that without looking no seeing can happen, at least not consistently. Like one swallow doesn’t make a spring, a glimpse, won’t alter your behavior.
And without the discipline to consistently act on what you see… ditto.
And what he also saw, through his own experience, personal and through people he coaches, that if you put yourself into an environment that is not conducive, does not agree, or even negate growth, or anything new, you’ll lose all your advantage, and pretty much everything you have ever achieved with the new faculties you created through consistent hard work.
This is why I warn people against ‘going home for the holidays’… or any gatherings that are like that.
One of the elements of growing is abandoning, leaving behind old beliefs that are kept in existence by speaking.
The human condition, the condition of the talking monkey is that everything, or nearly everything is through language… for a human.
Your personal reality,
and that is true for everyone… that is the human condition…
Reality is all facts… The cave is all talking. The proportion of the two will give you what you produce results with, what you produce your life with. Some of my students have as little as 1% of their personal reality is facts.
This situation, the human condition, is getting worse worldwide… People see less and less facts, and more an more ‘narrative’ which is all talk.
2. The second part is made of some speaking. Words. Interpretations and the resulting beliefs. About yourself, and about the world.
Many of these words come from the people in your life… life now, or life before… They KNOW how you are… impatient, angry, hasty, someone who can’t do anything right.
Many more come from you. Yourself. Those are mainly the following myths:
I am
because
is
and your ubiquitous therefores: having to, needing to, wanting to, and should.
All word-created… not reality, not facts. Unreality. Lies. All seemings. All designed to keep you the same, complacent, sheeple, effect… never a cause.
The 1000, on the other hand are the people who were willing to look at all those assumptions and lies that make it impossible for a person to become a producer.
Producer is a category by Ayn Rand… it is not enough to produce something of value… being a producer is an almost god-like way of being: full ownership, creating, and mastering reality.
In the book Atlas Shrugged, two protagonists aren’t producers for most of the 1000-page book. Dagny Taggart, a railroad owner, and Hank Rearde… high producers on their own right, and yet not producers in Ayn Rand’s categorizing, where to be a producer means the person’s goal is his own happiness as the moral purpose of his life, with productive achievement as his noblest activity, and reason as his only absolute.
Only when they can let go of society’s interest as their primary moral purpose when they become a true producer.
Obviously society, made up of moochers and looters, protest to that… as a baby protests when you take away the nipple…
And the ones who are not part of the 1000 are the eight billion… Their I am, because and is… come, not from creation, but from what they can see… what they have always seen… Given by words. Words that they are small, puny, this way and that… not self-defined, not self-created.
Before you can be helped by the energies, the DNA adjustment, the capacity activations, you already need to have been attempting, consistently, activating the capacities we are talking about. And for that you need to have some ambition to accomplish something that is only possible if you become bigger, more, better… a different person who can.
You can only see what you can see… and what you can see is mostly what you have always seen. What your belief system allows you to see.
If you believe that the world is a magical place, and you can repeat to yourself ‘I am a millionaire‘ and that will eventually make you a millionaire, then that is what you’ll hear. And that is a heap of horse manure, my dear.
But if you believe that changing yourself, changing how you think, changing how you live. changing where you look can take you there… then you’ll change yourself, change how you think, change how you live, and eventually get there, if that is what you are aiming at.
Affirmation don’t work unless you already believe them…
When back in 1987 I said to myself: I am brilliant and I am a contribution… it was nothing new. I was brilliant and I was a contribution. And so I wasn’t trying to change myself with that focus statement.
I was focusing my attention on my strengths instead of my neediness… I needed a job or I was going to be homeless.
No surprises there, I was hired immediately.
For my brilliance and for my willingness to be a contribution. They needed that.
I decided that being a fan, an admirer is a good way to be: the expert I want on my summit will love that.
But I didn’t say anything that was a lie: I just put my attention on seeing and saying what I liked, what I appreciated, what was unique about the other.
I am already appreciative. VERY appreciative and grateful.
You need to strengthen your strengths and invalidate your weaknesses, instead of making up bs affirmations: I am a millionaire… while the facts say: you can’t pay your rent. While the facts say: you spend 99% of your day doing irrelevant, not forward thinking actions…
You’ll see this incongruity about yourself if you are in my new free challenge (Clarity) where that the first leg of the work is: jotting down everything you do in a day, for a week.
Awareness is a b.i.t.c.h.!
But without awareness nothing can ever change… you’ll get older but not wiser.
Alex Hormozi trained his attention. He even hired a coach specifically for that.
I’ve been working on my attention too… My ability and control over my attention is 30%, while Alex’s is 50%.
I think so.
One of the things that hijacks your attention is the many things you do… what you say you need to do, want to do, should do…
And, of course, being inconsistent. Not getting up and being awake when other people are awake, so you are always interrupted for what they want. You don’t have any time, any energy to pay attention to what matters to you mooooos.
Always working IN your business (IN your life) not ON your business, not ON your life… not on yourself.
I have a client who set out to grow 1% a week. Doesn’t sound like much, but it is. It can result in almost doubling everything in a year’s time.
But to grow, you need time and energy to do that, exclusively. Not ‘by the way’… but just that… grow.
An hour a day should suffice… but unless you have an uninterrupted hour a day, where you are free, emotionally and physically free to work on growth… it is a pipe dream.
But she has two businesses, a family, and unless she creates an hour or two every single day for growth, she won’t grow 1% a week, she may even shrink.
Because that 1% is overall growth… Every area of life, including you personally, emotionally, intellectually, ambition, attention… EVERYTHING.
Unless your environment is favorable to only do the only things that are yours to do… i.e. the 1-2-3 things, literally, you will struggle to keep your attention on what is yours to do…
One of the moves of the Integrity Workshop is to decide what is important to do. what you’ll actually do. instead of having long todo lists of what you could do, would do if you had the time, the money, the opportunity, but don’t do.
The goal is that you end up doing what is yours to do, what will take you to the result you committed to.
And the things you are not going to do can go to a list called ‘incompletions’ to revisit once a month, or so. And either taken out of existence, i.e. killing them, or schedule them, put them on your calendar to a specific day and time and do them.
It’s a fantastic course that has produced quite a few people who started to produce results for the first time in their lives.
Start your journey with the Integrity WorkshopOne of the things on my Incomplete Cycles list was to dance on stage in a strip club and have money be stuffed into my clothes…
I was 50 years old at the time. I decided to go for it. So I scheduled it. I practiced for it. And I did it. That is how I removed it from my Incomplete Cycles list…
Oh, and it was fun too. Once I got over feeling old and decrepit.
Read the original article: How did the 1000 manage to become the 1000?
This article has a good idea… it suggests consistency as the way of establishing any new habit and making sure it will happen.
Anything worth doing is worth doing every day… day in, day out.
Meditation, spiritual work, being active, reading, learning… as a campaign they are all doomed to fail… but as a daily practice they build the foundation of a spectacular life.
When established, a daily habit becomes second nature. Just like cleaning your teeth in the morning or taking a shower – it would feel wrong to not do it. However with infrequent habits like music practise 3-6 times per week, or exercise twice per week, taking a day off can cause it to be harder to pick it up again afterwards. Then in one fell sweep your positive habit has been ruined completely, and everyday somehow becomes a holiday from it.
Turn a weekly habit into a daily one.
If you sleep in on Sunday morning, you’ll know how hard it can be to get up on Monday morning. The trick is to get up early every day. Even at the weekend. I always get up at 6am; and find it much easier to maintain if I do it every day. You might think that a life without sleeping in is not worth living for and that it’s really hard to do. But 100% consistency is the best way to do it.
With consistency, a habit should stay on autopilot for most of the time without you having to think about it. Part of the stress of getting up is the conflict between the desires to get up early or late. “Hmm, it’s Sunday, don’t I deserve a lie-in? Won’t I perform better with more sleep? I should really get up and write to the Daily Telegraph about the decline in the duck population.” If you stick with a habit every single day, you eliminate self doubt and uncertainty.
Sequence habits together
Rather than tackling several habits in isolation, link them together in a sequence so they become easier to maintain. My morning routine involves getting up, showering, breakfast, piano practise, a bike ride, then getting on the train to my day job. It’s almost as if the positive feelings from completing each task act as the impetus to start another. If I’m feeling a bit overworked, I can always forego one of the tasks, e.g. piano practise, and go straight to the next one. If the first and last links in the sequence remain, then my less musical routine still stays solid. The idea would be to put habits done 3-5 times per week in the middle of the chain so that they remain stable, even though you skip it some days.
Substitute infrequent habits
If you skip habits every so often by using the sequencing method – you can also substitute those infrequent habits with others, so that at least you are doing something constructive and keeping the routine. If you hit the gym 3 times per week, the other 4 days in the week could be filled with a short walk or some reading. Substituting the task with something similar is best, on your off days for exercise, a short walk is better than painting Warhammer figures. This ensures that your physical development is turned into an everyday habit, even though you only hit the gym 3 times per week.
Make concrete commitments
“I’ll exercise X times per week” Is far too ambiguous. Decide exactly when you will turn those promises into commitments, and don’t get all wishy washy about it. “I will hit a swimming pool at 6.30am on Monday, Wednesday and Friday alternating between front crawl and backstroke for half an hour” is orders of magnitude better.
Give yourself a target, and you’ll give yourself boundaries that are easy to follow, with guilt free time off when you’re done. It’s very easy to fail when you don’t do this; especially if you’re only accountable to yourself. On the day you’ve decided to do something, there should be no question, no doubt in your mind at all what you are going to do and when. If personal development isn’t for you then don’t commit to it, just be absolutely sure as to what you actually want.
Get others to give you a kick in the butt
Other people and their impetus are great for a bit of encouragement. Should you find it hard getting up early, arrange daily phone calls with a fellow lark. Get yourself an exercise buddy, and if the worst comes to the worst then pay for a personal trainer. Cook dinner for the kids. Moaning “cost-centres” as I call them are the best encouragement to do things in the world.
Your accountability is set in stone if you have others to please. Should your personal development involve you and only you, there is no one to make you do it. Involving others in your not-quite daily activities will surely get you moving.
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Tags: | getting unstuck | continue reading |
Read the original article: Maintaining Almost Daily Habits and Commitments
In a Landmark Education Course I took back in 1987, I learned that it is possible to live life from a new conversation, a new context: “Life is a conversation”
It is quite simple if you can wrap your mind around it, incredibly difficult if you are attached to the way you see the world. Continue reading