It’s New Year’s day. Billions of people give and get strokes… ((A stroke (in Transactional Analysis) is a unit of social transaction. A hug. A nod. A smile. A hello, a thank you, a “how are you?”, or an f… you…. these are all social transactions. The more you get the less your spine shrivels up on you…
Experiments show that babies stop thriving if they have insufficient social transactions… Other experiments how that rats are the same way. But the most surprising thing is: for a rat (and I guess for a human) an electric shock, a slap on the face, and insult also count as a stroke… preventing their spine from shriveling up.
My personal interpretation is: as long as life tells you you exist, you want
During the summer of 1966 I ran into a girl I knew from elementary school. Turns out she applied and was accepted to the same school I was going to start in that September.
We were having a chat. I remember thinking to myself: Compared to her I know everything… why am I going to school?
We both graduated. I am sure she still thinks she knows everything. My experience is that I know less and less as time goes by.
Whether you can identify with my 19 year old person, or my 69 year old person, and to what degree will be important, so jot it down.
Her soul correction is Fear/Fearless. In the conversation it was becoming obvious that she had read the book “Feelings”. I have been so excited about. So the conversation was on a more even footing that most of my conversations: she has been paying attention and recognizing at least some of the dynamics the feelings have, and has been managing her fear quite well.
Buy the book “Feelings” Show proof of purchase for a pdf… you’ll need it. It’s hard to see the illustration on Kindle…
You have always wanted to get out of your head. You tried meditation
We all have a need to fulfill others expectations of us, and also some of us have the need to fulfill our own expectations of ourselves.
Now, what if someone says something about you, or something that you like, find important, says something that conflicts with what you think about yourself, your self-image? Your “I” you consider your Self. (it isn’t… by the way)
Your experience is that you are devalued. ((devaluation. means The decrease in value of one currency in relation to another, usually by action of the government. When a currency is devalued, it buys less in foreign markets.))
I just had a “conversation” with a student, where I suggested that she uses ego to support her growth.
From her answers it has become clear that “using ego” is not a commonplace conversation, and that it needs instruction.
So let’s see what ego is, and what it isn’t.
Ego is a lot like a kitchen knife: you can use it for good, for useful, or for harm… kill with it. You can also use it to clean it under your nails… somewhat useful, but not the right tool…
You can also call it bad, and ban it from your house. ((It is also a lot like a nail. It concentrates the energy so it can go through thick planks
Ever since I’ve started to download the energy of the Days of Power, I’ve been wondering how I am going to know it’s working… how it will manifest, practically, in my life.
Whenever something new comes in, my imagination goes to the known, the familiar, and I guess that is how the human mind works.
So I had no idea what may happen, what could happen, given the energy.
During the summer of 1966 I ran into a girl I knew from elementary school. Turns out she applied and was accepted to the same school I was going to start in that September.
We were having a chat. I remember thinking to myself: Compared to her I know everything… why am I going to school?
We both graduated. I am sure she still thinks she knows everything. My experience is that I know less and less as time goes by.
Whether you can identify with my 19 year old person, or my 69 year old person, and to what degree will be important, so jot it down.
To my surprise, people have no idea that their worth a damn factor has been neglected since they were little babies.
They get “encouragement” to not know that there is such a thing… and then they grow up to be seriously not worth a damn, and they suffer.
How does it work?
If you are consistently praised for being a good girl, a pretty girl, a smart girl… you’ll think that that is what there is to it. That is your ticket to the good life, to paradise.
This is an article I snatched from the New York Times…
What you don’t know is this: you teach your children to color inside the lines, never experiment, never make mistakes, to live in fear, and to experience little. To not even experience what they experience. To be little soldiers that will make you look good, while you attempt to live your life and give as little attention to the kids as you can.
Hell on earth…
One one hand you are protective, on the other you neglect them… And then you fell guilty.
Just look back at your childhood. You are stunted, and your children are stunted.
This article explains some of why… some, not all.
In the article of my own that I will publish today (it’s not ready yet) I will add some more clarity.
Caring for children shouldn’t be like carpentry, with a finished product in mind. We should grow our children, like gardeners
This is one article, with two separate yet connected parts.
Part 1: Flashes of brilliance
Growth is not linear. By that I mean that you don’t grow a little bit every day. It is much like evolution: something tiny changes, and it creates a dramatic shift.
When things feel linear, it also means that you are simply stirring the soup… no growth. It’s OK.
Yesterday I had a glimpse at something that I had never seen: I saw that if opportunity favors the prepared… then I am in trouble: I am not prepared for any opportunity.
It’s New Year’s day. Billions of people give and get strokes… ((A stroke (in Transactional Analysis) is a unit of social transaction. A hug. A nod. A smile. A hello, a thank you, a “how are you?”, or an f… you…. these are all social transactions. The more you get the less your spine shrivels up on you…
