On Saturday, January 3rd, at exactly 5:42 pm my nose started to bleed. By the time I grabbed something to hold to my nose I was soaked in blood. Red, thick, beautiful blood. Scary. My inner eyes projected a scenario: me, on the floor, dead, in a pool of blood.
I checked my pulse and it was bang, bang, bang, unusually strong. “I must have high blood pressure” I thought. Both my parents died of broken blood vessels… and both my brothers have high blood pressure.
The blood eruption repeated itself at 11:02 pm, three times on Sunday, and twice on Monday.
Monday night, as I was staring at the blank wall contemplating the chances of dying, I suddenly saw my Kabbalah teacher in my mind’s eye. She recently recovered from a nasty disease, and it had done her a world of
I should be doing some laundry. I have run out of socks… And anyways, I want to tame this beast of not doing my laundry.
I gather a load’s worth of stuff, carry it to the washing machine… and the distaste, the disgust is so strong… I take a beeline… and sit down by my computer.
Distaste, eh? Yeah, says muscle test. Disgust? yes. Was it always there? No. Was it from when i was 3? later… from age seven.
What was happening at age seven? I went to school. We had a live-in help: my mother was working on her Masters Degree, coming home around nine every night. My brother was about a year old… and was probably driving the live-in help bonkers.
I have one student who actually is doing the work the way the work was meant to be done.
It sounds meager… but it is all I ever wanted… really.
If you have one student who actually does what you teach, you can tell if what you teach works or not. Or tweak what you teach to accommodate the difficulties they experience. And watch if the changes you made will make the results match what you intended to accomplish.
What do the rest of the people do? I mean the students in the same program? I am not sure. Apple polishing? Feeble attempts to fake me?
Humans live this fake, apple polishing lives, thinking that life should respond to their feeble attempts, t
20 years ago I had my first entrepreneur value profile done.
It was some 30 pages long… a lot of English. But it said something like: I don’t work well through others…
Bummer…
A year or two later I got my certification to become a value profile consultant. Then I learned to see all that the 30 page said in English (meaning lots of words) at a glance on a grid.
My starting point measurements is a lot like that grid. It is more meant for the coach/consultant to know how to guide you, than for you to enjoy reading to indulge your delusional self.
You want to live a life where you say this about yourself, a lot. “…And I lived to tell the tale…”
Where you are on the edge… and come back to tell the tale.
The edge? it feels like the dividing line between life and death. It is just a feeling. Some edge is quite inconsequential, but the going there is tremendous.
I signed up to be coached on Monday, and it’s Sunday, and I am already “fired”.
Another man’s integrity may be out of integrity for you. Another man’s wisdom is not YOUR wisdom. That is what happened.
I was asked to do something that doesn’t agree, doesn’t foster love between my two selves. Everybody is doing it… but for me to love ME, I can’t do it.
I have an older blog that is attacked by hackers every week. They install malware… so I don’t want you to go there…
It’s an old website, more than 10 years ago it was my main blog. Most of it is still useful. ((I have read an interview with Jeff Bezos the other day, or was it a youtube video, can’t remember. He was asked a question about the future. He said something incredibly insightful, and something most people can’t even hear!
He said that the question to ask is this: What will remain the same?
Most people try something new, something shiny, something that is a new trend.
But real winners learn what works and what will work now, ten years from now, a hundred years from now. And
When you ask people what made them who they are today, invariably all of them answer a version of the same thing: The past.
How they express this varies: my parents, my schooling, what I have been doing, my genes, etc. etc. but all in all, they all mean the same: what makes me who I am today is the past.
If that were true, that would be bad news, really.
Imagine that it is true. Now see yourself trying to be successful online. Given your track record, and your genes, and your past behavior, how much chance do you have for success?
I’d love to say zero, but it would be unfair to many of you. So instead, I answer it in a way that applies to all of you:
The same as yesterday. Or a year ago…
Now, that is a total bummer, isn’t it?
And it is total hogwash. It is a lie. It is an illusion.
If that were true, no change would be possible. And people do change. Not many, not often, but they do.
I am doing a business project with my brand spanking new coach… and…
As it was predictable, this is my fourth day only, I already got to a place, where fear is coming up.
I am glad, because I am so rarely afraid. This will give me an opportunity to notice something Tree of Life for my scaredy cat clients and students.
So I am afraid. IT, the voice, is whispering sweet nothings into my ear, lol. “It’s not important.” “You are already fine.” “What if you lose all the money you’ve made?” “he doesn’t know…”
“I hear you,” I answer cheerily, and continue looking at how to organize my advertising. ((I used to have this conversation with my cats: They would yowl, and I wou
On Saturday, January 3rd, at exactly 5:42 pm my nose started to bleed. By the time I grabbed something to hold to my nose I was soaked in blood. Red, thick, beautiful blood. Scary. My inner eyes projected a scenario: me, on the floor, dead, in a pool of blood.
