You can lie to yourself, but you can’t lie to me or The culture of “good enough” fun

d5b9d-roosterOne of my students wrote to me this morning. He said:

Ok I finished my billing the other day but something I didn’t catch yesterday and this morning I got caught in my lie of not generating I relaxed. I now know I have to be more aware of this now.

Oh that… the hidden reason so many quit. The hidden reason why people quit before they get results. The hidden reason life is a series of flashes in the pan for most people.

It can be best illustrated with a story I have shared time and again, but it fits here perfectly.

The dog wakes up one morning a

I just learned a new word. Mentality. I could add another: social attitudes

trying-to-bring-you-downThis article was designed to make you look… to be interactive, co-creative.

Even the pictures are a question: what is the mentality, what is the attitude, the social attitude, that it represents? Please work with me: you’ll get insight from it, Guaranteed.

And I will need your help with mining all the gold that can be found in that new word.

Can you tell what someone’s mentality is? I bet you have never asked this question, am I right? I don’t think I have, at least not this word. Maybe I used mindset. Maybe I used attitude.

Swim or sink… do or die

to be in a sink or swim situation, you first need to jumpinto the waterThis morning my main computer quietly died.

Times like this are the real tests whether the capacities are working or not.

Suddenly I had no access to anything that is on that computer, not the data, not the software, and I had a few choices: go crazy, go out of business, or bring resiliency, aka mental toughness to carry the day.

It’s Tuesday, and a few minutes after the death of my trusty computer, I went downstairs and to my weekly outing to the chiropractor and to the gro

Only failures, only mistakes teach you anything useful… or how I learn from my mistakes

Its-a-Wonderful-LifeI have been leading a webinar for quite a while, and it has always been brilliant, both to participate in and to lead.

It has always delivered on the promise:

  1. show you what’s missing in an area of life, something that you can do something about so you can get unstuck and have that area of life be a lot better… and consequently all of your life.
  2. Effect you so strong that it would get you, or a lot of you, finally get off your ass, and into action.

It’s worked for years… and this past weekend it didn’t.

I have now spent hours

The difference between feeling confident and being confident… or how you put your life in the hands of a liar

feelings-are-just-visitors-let-them-come-and-go-quote-1It’s Christmas Eve. Strong Southern wind… unusual noises… and bouts of wanting to weep. WTF? There is nothing wrong with my life, I am not connected to anyone in particular, and yet.

I muscle test if it is the Dark Side emotion transmission, and yes, it is…

Feelings come from who knows where, and yet, YOU are basing all your decisions on feelings. How utterly misguided is that?

If the feeling were: you can do it, you’d jump i

How, what you don’t know that you don’t know, is biting you… and you can’t see what bit you without help

youDontKnowYouDontKnowHow, what you don’t know that you don’t know, is biting you… and you can’t see what bit you without help

If I asked you what it is that you don’t know that you don’t know… no matter how long you looked, you would not see anything, because it is either that you don’t know or the question is stupid.

But everything that is missing for you to know is in that: what you don’t know that you don’t know.

The question is: is there a way to see what you don’t know that you don’t know? The answer is: yes… other people’s blind spots are different from y

The most generous thing you can ever do…

the strait... the best analogy I could find for distinctionI wrote in the last article that guiding anyone, including yourself with the positive statement is the fastest way to misery… Positive statements, including affirmations, don’t define anything.

The expression “strait and narrow” is brilliant, because it tells it how it is: the strait, as in the Bering Strait… is the key: everything that is NOT land is the strait… the land defines the strait, nothing inside the strait defines it… only its boundary. Same with a river. And same with generosity.

Givi

Cinematherapy: what does it do? It teaches you to feel.

FeelingsMovies with good actors do it better…

American actors are mostly useless, but it may be because American directors have no empathy? And yet some of the most missing feelings I got from American TV series I have watched through Netflix. I have recently learned family love, and being able to choose, ultimately, what is win-win… in a series I am watching now, Blue Bloods about a Irish family of cops in New York City. I also had a peek at something I didn’t know I wanted to feel: how religion is for people who have faith…

I don’t know if it is the actors or the di

What is the true stumbling block preventing you from going from A to B?

stumbling-blockI have been wrong.

I have been wrong in thinking that humility is the ultimate stumbling block. It seems that humility can help the mind withdraw from the “I don’t need to hear this I already know everything” stance, and allow you to learn, and use your other faculties.

But I can now see, that without courage first activated, present and in working order, humility won’t be accepted, because it takes courage to get out of the mind.

I hate that this is so… after all I spent so much time attempting to activate humility, with no success.

So we are down to courage…

What is courage really?

An

What or who makes the decisions in your life? About important things…

seneca quote for memesWhat or who makes the decisions in your life? About important things…

This question is long overdue.

It came up because of the conversation I was having with 10 of my best students.

How to be in the face of fear.

I bet you know that it takes courage to grow. Growth means growing into uncharted territory. For you, not uncharted in general, uncharted for you. Much like going to shop in the supermarket