The story you so diligently protect… that you lie for, you die for…

The single reason most people don’t want to work with me is this: I will rob them (attempt to) of their sob story. ((Sob story: a repeating way to be miserable, to lose out on life, to be beaten down))

What’s a sob story?

Well, everybody has one… It was born after an incident in early childhood.

Something happened, and you made a decision about yourself, about the world, about your mother.

Some people have interlocking decisions, making the sob story as strong as a Greek myth.

As long as your sob story is intact, you lie through your life to mai

The deathbed exercise

There is a step in the 67 step program that wants you to look at what would be your obituary if you died today.

But there is a much better test, the test:

imagining yourself being on your deathbed: a thought exercise.

Until today I’d thought that what it drives up is all the things you haven’t done, all the things that are important and maybe you can do now… tell people you love them, and other trite things like that.

But today of all days I had an insight.

The insight came because I was trying to figure out what is in common in people who do the 67-step program w

You decide: mind candy or good teaching?

Life is a game. This is your strategy guide

Source

Real life is the game that – literally – everyone is playing. But it can be tough. This is your guide.

Basics

You might not realise, but real life is a game of strategy. There are some fun mini-games – like dancing, driving, running, and sex – but the key to winning is simply managing your resource

The many ways to be unhappy, the only way to be happy…

I mean this article to be the first installment in a series.

The underlying principle is the Anna Karenina principle

The Anna Karenina principle

The Anna Karenina principle is: good systems must meet simultaneously a number of requirements. All good systems are alike, bad systems are bad in their own way

Tolstoy said: Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way

Aristotle said: success/failure: …it is possible to fail in many ways (for evil belongs to the class of the

The secret sauce that makes you start having joy in your life

The fox and the hare tale: Why does a rabbit run faster than a fox? Because while the fox is running for his dinner, the rabbit is running for his life. All of life works the same way…

I have noticed that take-away, as a manipulation technique, works exceptionally well on me.

Here is how the technique works: you show something, and you state that it is only available at this price for a limited amount of time.

I find myself scrambling to get it.

Do you have free will? Free choice? What is the ego’s role in that?

Genetic determinism ((Genetic determinism is the mechanism by which genes, along with environmental conditions, determine looks and behavior.)) and the ego’s role in it.

I could also have made the title: your horoscope and your ego’s role in it, or your soul correction and your ego’s role in it.

There is a lot of different ways people define ego, but what if the ego is none of those. Not what Freud called ego, not what gurus call ego.

What if the ego is simply the mechanism by which the Selfish Gene perpetuates itself… like an old dog that is un

Thought experiments: the wise’s way to learn, the wise’s way to win in life

The stupid makes the same mistake, over and over, expecting different results.
The normal person eventually learns from his mistakes, but he first has to make them, a few times…
The wise person learns from other people’s mistakes.

Did you notice that we are not talking here about IQ? About ability?

No, the behavior ascribed to the stupid and the behavior of the wise can and often come from the same IQ.

The ability to do things differently can’t be accessed without a modicum of humility. Modicum means: a little bit.

Humility is a capacity, an attitu

If nothing has worked for you… you are still as stuck as ever

Let’s look at the role of discovery in growth… your growth… if there is no growth, there has been no discovery.

All the steps of the 67 steps program are nudges for you to discover something that you haven’t seen.

Of course, like with everything, your tendency is to go to your head for the answers, and not look at all outside of your head.

The step (Step 5) where the homework is to list what you see about poor people and rich people is a great step to show your relationship to growth.

If you think you are rich, you go and tell me how what you do, how you think,

One reason you have no peace inside… And how you could…

I just discovered that the version of the Freecell game is “forgiving”, i.e. you can go back more than one step… “start over again” without a penalty point.

This makes the game an even better modeling tool than it used to be.

I always suspected that the first step really decides the rest of the journey… but being a Quickstart… jumping-without-thinking-type-of-person, this would not have

What you are doing now is not working. You deserve better…

What kind of deserving is in that title?

Systemic? Extrinsic? Intrinsic?

Systemic would be: you are on my site, you are reading this, therefore you must be a good person… also deserving?
Extrinsic would be: you have provided me with a lot of value, but what you are doing isn’t getting you the results, the rewards you deserve…
Intrinsic would be: you are a human… deserving a chance at a great life. Of course you need to earn it. Let me show you how to stop what you

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