The hardest thing to navigate, at least for me, is to take myself out of the center… Maybe because of my soul correction “Forget Thyself” but it comes back to make me miserable periodically.
I have been testy lately.
I have always wanted to be significant. Do significant things. Be admired… blah blah blah.
What I didn’t realize that like everything ego desire based, desire to receive for the self alone, it has a shadow side.
When you are significant, and someone doesn’t give you what you think they are supposed to… you are angry and miserable.
I had an interesting insight yesterday: you don’t know what it feels like to have courage available to you.
When you apply courage, it just feels like you are doing what you are doing, what you were afraid of. Normal.
Which indicates to me, that courage is a paradigm-shifter.
Paradigm is like a glass ceiling. A one-side mirror. When you are in a higher paradigm, you can see what is below you, but if you are still in a lower paradigm, you cannot see what’s above. In fact you don’t know there is something, anything.
As I am dealing with the issue of courage, I realized something that I had never quite seen before:
All the quotes, all the memes, all the nice sayings on the internet have one function only: to make you stay the same.
And by same I mean driven by ego, fear, cowardice, slothfulness, superiority, pretense… etc.
Now, that is a bold statement, after all those quotes and memes, and nice sayings, and even coaching claim and sound and look inspiring. And therein lies the mischief:
They suggest that you can just simple want it more, choose it, believe it and then you can have it… whatever the
I have been wrong in thinking that humility is the ultimate stumbling block. It seems that humility can help the mind withdraw from the “I don’t need to hear this I already know everything” stance, and allow you to learn, and use your other faculties.
But I can now see, that without courage first activated, present and in working order, humility won’t be accepted, because it takes courage to get out of the mind.
I hate that this is so… after all I spent so much time attempting to activate humility, with no success.
The truth, the big picture, and all the details are in the hidden dimension of the universe. And to unfold any of it, work is needed. Persistent poking of the box.
Some cultures are box-pokers, and others are complacent, satisfied with the size of their jail cell.
I come from a box-poker culture.
Individuals, of course, differ in their level of desire to go beyond the walls… But the average, the culture, is either box poker or not… degrees again… not black and white.
I am starting to see that this missing capacity: the capacity to see a process ((noun: process; plural noun: processes
a series of actions or steps taken in order to achieve a particular end.
“military operations could jeopardize the peace process”
synonyms: procedure, operation, action, activity, exercise, affair, business, job, task, undertaking
“investigation is a long process”)) , design a process, to have a strategy, is what’s missing to take me out of the one woman band existence.
I shared a few bits here and there today with my chiropractor… He has 13 capacities used.
The conversation was an utter and total failure.
Capacities, abilities, is a whole new concept, and he wasn’t even getting a glimpse of what I was talking about. Very interesting.
It seems that the mistaken belief is that you can learn anything… including being an investor like Warren Buffet… that is a total illusion: you cannot learn anything that you don’t have the capacities for.
Most types of learning, like classes, coaching, etc. don’t take you to a place where the capacity missing would turn on, because you are ready for i
You can’t win the bets you don’t make. You can’t win the arguments you don’t engage in. You can’t win without taking risks.
