On Saturday, January 3rd, at exactly 5:42 pm my nose started to bleed. By the time I grabbed something to hold to my nose I was soaked in blood. Red, thick, beautiful blood. Scary. My inner eyes projected a scenario: me, on the floor, dead, in a pool of blood.
I checked my pulse and it was bang, bang, bang, unusually strong. “I must have high blood pressure” I thought. Both my parents died of broken blood vessels… and both my brothers have high blood pressure.
The blood eruption repeated itself at 11:02 pm, three times on Sunday, and twice on Monday.
Monday night, as I was staring at the blank wall contemplating the chances of dying, I suddenly saw my Kabbalah teacher in my mind’s eye. She recently recovered from a nasty disease, and it had done her a world of
Tai uses an analogy that really talks to me. He says that we need to be like a soup, our knowledge, our lives.
You can’t make a good soup with just a few ingredients. You need a lot of ingredients to make a soup that you don’t have to make edible by crumbling crackers into it, or bread. ((Some poor man’s soups, onion soup, garlic soup, “rue” soup in Hungary, are so uninteresting that you can’t eat it without putting bread in them. The versions with poached egg, cheese melted on top, etc. are the restaurant versions of the same soups… but the soup itself is a poor man’s soup. Poor as in not having much to give.
Her soul correction is Fear/Fearless. In the conversation it was becoming obvious that she had read the book “Feelings”. I have been so excited about. So the conversation was on a more even footing that most of my conversations: she has been paying attention and recognizing at least some of the dynamics the feelings have, and has been managing her fear quite well.
Buy the book “Feelings” Show proof of purchase for a pdf… you’ll need it. It’s hard to see the illustration on Kindle…
You have always wanted to get out of your head. You tried meditation
This is paraphrasing the famous Leo Tolstoy quote: “All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.” This is the Anna Karenina principle… As all principles do, it applies to many, maybe even all areas of life. A principle is the same as a distinction… I say.
But truth is, if you know distinctions, if you know patterns, there are only about 50 different ways to get stuck… and your way is just one or two of those.
I just had a “conversation” with a student, where I suggested that she uses ego to support her growth.
From her answers it has become clear that “using ego” is not a commonplace conversation, and that it needs instruction.
So let’s see what ego is, and what it isn’t.
Ego is a lot like a kitchen knife: you can use it for good, for useful, or for harm… kill with it. You can also use it to clean it under your nails… somewhat useful, but not the right tool…
You can also call it bad, and ban it from your house. ((It is also a lot like a nail. It concentrates the energy so it can go through thick planks
One of my clients is unwilling to take Omega 2 capsules, because he says: “I don’t want to get fat”
I first started to experiment with the fat burning metabolism some six years ago.
I liked the idea of eating sugar free ice cream from real cream…
I packed on 30 lbs, 13-14 kilos, in 10 days.
I have been eating a stick of butter a day, fatty lamb, and eggs… for two months now.
I am dropping between half a pound to a pound a week.
I feel good. I do have some carbohydrate cravings and I satisfy it by eating peppers, and almonds. Both slightly sweet. just enough to stop the cravings. A gram here and there…
Sometimes the turmoil is caused by some inner pressure that is societally driven.
When being true to yourself is not politically correct.
Your ability, your capacity to hold controversy and ambivalence comes really handy when you have a turmoil.
Why? Because the urge to call the turmoil wrong, and the urge to look for a fix is overwhelming if you don’t have that capacity, that emotional and spiritual maturity.
And most people don’t.
Having the capacity to hold the idea and the opposite, without being overly perturbed is a very high capacit
I have, so far, dropped 23 pounds, about 10 kg. My bone structure is starting to show… starting. I didn’t diet, but I completely overhauled my diet, removed everything that doesn’t agree with my body, and added all the nutrients that are essential. I feel good, I have no cravings, and it is very sustainable… I can live like this till the day I die.
I have gone from completely sedentary, because of pain, to sprightly, as some people called me yesterday. I now only have pain when walking.
I am in better mood than ever, I laugh easily, and feel good about my life, about life itself, about
Rarely, (hailing mostly from other countries,) I find people who have all the 90 daily essential nutrients supplied in their diet. Amazing.
Now, the craze of taking supplements, the MLM (Network Marketing) type of sales systems gets to these people through friends and family, and they start taking “designer” supplements, and suddenly they don’t feel well.
They are entering the Western world’s unhealthy habit of trying to fix something that is not broken.
Having your 90 daily essentials checked by me is an amazing idea because it informs you AGAINST all the hype, what it is that you need, and what it is that you don’t.
There is a deep human need to make our lives controllable. To be in control. To be certain. To be safe.
And there is this deep human need to see more, be more, feel more, have more, experience more.
They point to opposing directions, and they tend to jerk you back and forth.
It’s an oscillating structure.
Like every oscillating structure, the tension between the two extremes cannot be resolved, there is no ess… the battle will continue as long as… let me address that later.
On Saturday, January 3rd, at exactly 5:42 pm my nose started to bleed. By the time I grabbed something to hold to my nose I was soaked in blood. Red, thick, beautiful blood. Scary. My inner eyes projected a scenario: me, on the floor, dead, in a pool of blood.
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