How do you decide if you have value or not?

The current state of this area: deciding on your value is abysmal… and keeps you anxious, worried, and not happy.

You always think that your understanding is the correct understanding of reality.

You think you understand what people say, what people mean.

You never consider that your understanding is based on your small picture of reality… and you never think to grow your picture of reality, or to ask something new.

This is most visible when from some event your overall intelligence shuts down, but you remember yourself as intelligent and sharp.

As you may know, I frequently need to redefine myself so I can be well and happy.

As a teacher, the most “natural” thing to do is define myself by the results I produce.

The favorite teacher movies, like Knights of the South Bronx, put the teacher on pedestal because he made some miracles happen for some in his class.

    But it is mighty stupid to place your own evaluation of yourself at the mercy of others.

Some of my students hinge their value for themselves on the fact that they are not popular, that they are not liked. Stupid.

Some of my students hinge their value for themselves on how much money they make, how many people come to their performances, etc.

They are valid ways to look at your value, but will leave you at the mercy of others… stranded, unhappy… eventually.

This may be the reason popular entertainers, actors, grossly overpaid, have an empty life. They have one way to measure themselves… and they dare not to look at themselves in any other way… so they remain uneducated, unhappy, at the mercy of fame.

The other day I asked you to tell me if 1. you have anything to live for, and 2. if you died, people would suffer…

That was not a very popular question, because you are afraid to be measured that way. And yet, you can be measured in many different ways. This way measuring asks two questions: do you have a value of what you do for yourself? do you have a value for others?

I did get answers. 90% explained why they don’t… and 10% explained that their children would suffer.

Asking uncomfortable questions forces you to look, and decide if you’d want to change anything or not.

But having a fuller, bigger picture for reality makes you more intelligent, even if you don’t have the big picture capacity…

Had the blind men in the elephant story (what is an elephant) considered that the “other” is also right, they would have started to see that the picture they personally experience is part of a bigger picture.

But they weren’t more intelligent, and alas, neither are you… or most of you.

Value is only value in a certain context. Value is an answer to a question: a narrow slice of reality.

Let me give you an example: In Landmark Education, the leaders of a course are evaluated (value!) by three numbers:
1. participation: how many of the people who registered come to every session
2. how many of the participants registers (buys) into the next course
3. how many guests they bring to the public event at the end of the course.

No question, no attention, no value is given to the difference the leader makes, the lives he saves, the future that opens up for someone. Or the leader’s grace under pressure, the leader’s ease of taking people to where they need to be taken, or their ability to make people experience the course as an adventure… for example.

The value this company gives to its employees is measured in sales and selling opportunities the person causes.

High pressure… but each company decides what is their focus.

In the company called YOU, you are the CEO and you are the employee.

YOU decide what will be the criteria of evaluation of yourself.

But unless you have some criteria that you could pay attention to, you are left with your default.

Popularity, being pretty, being thin, knowing the answers, making money… all pretty default.

So, this next part, is interactive: I need your input.

Please comment, anonymously if you must, or email me if the comment box doesn’t work on your mobile. I’d like 100% participation, please.

Give me an evaluation criteria you could measure yourself by. So you could feel better about yourself, or so you could grow… either way, something other than you already use as a yardstick.

Example:
I have recently written a bunch of articles on getting well, so you can get more intelligent, so you can grow.

Health is a criteria I have been using for myself. The results are simply stunning: I recovered from a viral food poisoning (I ate unwashed vegetables that were obviously touched by someone sick) in a day and a half. No medication, no potions, just rest, lots of water, and certainty that my body is strong enough to fight the virus off.

I have also noticed that climbing stairs is not as painful as even two weeks ago…

I have decided to not base my value, or the value of my teachings on what other people do with it. Because I have no control over that.

Even with the health consultations: 99% of the people are 100-200% better even after just two weeks… I consider that a feedback, but not the basis of my evaluation of myself.

And I am much happier for it.

So, let me repeat: Please comment, anonymously if you must, or email me if the comment box doesn’t work on your mobile. I’d like 100% participation, please.

Give me an evaluation criteria you could measure yourself by. So you could feel better about yourself, or so you could grow… either way, something other than you already use as a yardstick.

This is not so much for me, but for you… so you force yourself to think of a criteria, a yardstick, that allows you to be independent of others’ opinion, others’ actions, so you can like yourself, and be happier.

Really.

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